Here's Lookin' at You, Nana-face

"Come on-a my house, my house a come on,

Come on-a my house, my house a come on,

Come on-a my house, my house, I'm gonna give you candy,

Come on-a my house, my house, I'm gonna give you everything" - Rosemary Clooney

This is the song I can remember my Nana bobbing around singing from time to time. On this day 76 years ago in Montreal, my Mrs Claus incarnate Nana was born, so today we're singing a different, but just as cheery a tune. We're just missing one thing, Nana.

Growing up, I was a little apprehensive about my Nana, not that she ever gave me reason to be. I just didn't know how to take her. She seemed a little gruff, if you started to colour a picture in one of the colouring books at her house, you were expected to finish it. (In reality, she had raised 9 kids and watched 14 grand kids come into the world- she just didn't take any guff and when she'd had enough, you were gonna know about it.) It wasn't until I was older that my perception of Nana changed and became clearer. (And it helped that I could remember them - my memories seem pretty sparse in the beginning, and I'm not sure why.)

One of my first memories of Nan was about my 5th or 6th birthday. Nana came to Vernon from Salmon Arm and picked me up at my house and took me to this deli style sandwich shop. It was just me and Nana.  I remember she gave me a white wrist watch as a present and even helped me put it on. That's also the day Lemon Meringue pie became my favorite.

There was a family reunion out at Nana & Gramps' farm when I was about 8. I remember walking into the house when we got there and my Dad asking Nana, "So where's Nana at????" I looked at him a little perplexed, pointed to Nana and said "She's right there." He kind've chuckled and said "No, I meant my Nana." We were told that Dad's Nana (referred to and known as Little Nana) was in one of the basement bedrooms. Just then, Little Nana came up the stairs, noticed more people said "Oh My!" reeled on her heals and was headed back down stairs. It wasn't until much later that my Nana started to look like Dad's Nana. (In other words, til Nana looked like her Mum.)

When I was almost 20, I moved away from home by myself for the first time. A couple weeks before I moved, I phoned Nana and asked her if I could "come over and play". I had intended to stay for a morning coffee which turned into Lunch and Dinner as well. This was the visit where I got to know Nana as a person, not just as a Nana. She told me about her life back East in Montreal, her trek from back East to settle the West, growing up and her family, meeting my Gramps and starting a family. (Like I say, she had 9 kids.) She told me stories of my Dad and my aunts and uncles, about how she'd lay in bed and hear the kids she knew snuck out sneak back in. She wasn't dumb, she knew they left and didn't sleep well until she heard them sneak through the window etc. She told me stories about her Mum (The a fore mentioned Little Nana) and about how her family immigrated to Canada from Scotland. Military stories were brought up of my Nana's Parents and Grandparents. This was when she told me she never knew her Gramps (Little Nana's Dad), because he was lost in World War I when Little Nana was just a girl. She told me how she worked in a Department store with one of her best friends. They would constantly giggle and have fun, and one time she and her friend were mistaken for something that was totally Taboo at the time. It's one of the memories I hold dearest. I wish I had written more information down, for this day was what sparked my interest in Genealogy and tracing my Family Tree.

Not last Christmas but the Christmas before (2008) was a bizarre experience. It was always traditional in my immediate family, that Christmas Eve was spent at Nana & Gramps' (until it became just Nana's) and then we spent Christmas Day with Mum's side of the family. Well, 2008 Mum & Dad were back East in Ontario... (In my lifetime, it was the 1st time Mum missed a Christmas at home, and only the 2nd for Dad.) I didn't think that I would be able to see Nana that year... Until my cousins Lisa and Lindsey helped me out. (And yes, Nana had called me by both their names more than once... Must be the whole Lisa/Lauren/Lindsey thing.) I went out to Nan's with Lisa and her daughter Destinee on the 23rd. We were sleeping over at Nan's place then going to Auntie June's the next day, from there Lindsey would give me a lift back to Vernon. (This was a rarity for me, I can think of maybe one or two occasions where I slept over at Nan's.)

We settled around the table, Nan, Lisa, Destinee and me, and started playing a word board game. I think it was Mad Gab or something, it's the one where you've got Wheel U Mare em e on the card and you are supposed to get Will You Marry Me? out of it. I was sitting right next to Nana, who was totally involved in the game even though Lisa seemed to be slaying us. After a minute at most, Lisa was getting the answers. I was starting to get bored, and I started poking fun at Nana... The funny part was, she didn't seem to be paying attention to anything other than the game, and had no clue what was going on. Destinee and Lisa were killing themselves giggling and carrying on. Finally after about 10 - 15 minutes I turned to Nana and asked her why the heck she wasn't back handing me. She asked why and I told her, this caused Lisa and Destinee to bust a gut again which got Nana just laughing away too. I was a little bugger but that's OK, I can dig it.

I wasn't as close to Nana as I would've like to have been, and that was my fault. I remember calling her from Whistler when I did the Olympic stint and she was thrilled to hear what was going on. When I first started this job, she was happy to hear that I was gainfully employed doing something she had done many years earlier. I always had her say the word "bra" for me. Being that she was from "down east" as she put it, she pronounced bra differently. I'd walk in and say "Hey Nan, say bra for me." She'd cock an eyebrow and say it... I just got a kick out of it, you have to hear it, reading it just won't translate. I usually would get a phone call on my birthday, in fact I half expected one two weeks ago that never came.

Can we pretend that airplanes in the night sky are like shooting stars?
I could really use a wish right now, wish right now, wish right now.

Nana fought hard but lost her battle with Cancer August 11th of this year. I missed her by two days which still lays heavy on my heart. She was survived by 9 kids, 13 grand kids, and 3, soon to be 4, great grand kids.  She also left behind sisters, brothers and many nieces and nephews. I can still hear her telling me to stop telling the room mate to shut up, or she'd go Ninja Nana on me. I can still picture her putting her napkin bib on before dinner, because she almost always wore something from dinner.

Two days after she passed I was at my parents' house on the deck alone. It was getting to be dusk, closer to dark. The satellites, stars and Venus were beginning to appear. I looked up and said, "Well I'm here Nan, sorry I missed you." A satellite just then shot across the sky. I knew she heard.

Nan was quick and witty, strong yet soft and understanding. She was one of the most selfless people known around. My last Christmas with her, she was battling hard and was more concerned that she didn't have a present for me and tried to apologize for it. I wasn't there when she was born 76 years ago today, and I unfortunately wasn't there when she passed. I was fortunate enough to know her for almost 29 years.

RIP Barbara Fiddes Taylor (October 5, 1934 - August 11, 2010.) You are gone but will never be forgotten.

... I miss and love you and I'll see you again, my Nana friend......